Sunday, 8 November 2009
eco notes
Four basic sets of criticisms
Sunday, 11 October 2009
The micro-organism that killed itself... and humanity.
Or, How the Earth was saved.
Pete was watching the monitor intensely. 30... 20... 15...
Knock knock
Damnit, thought Pete. He quickly pulled his pants up and, adjusting his jacket, opened the door.
“Ah, Jacqueline,” he said, slowly opening the door wider, “to what do I owe this pleasure?”
“It’s this here sir...” She looked slightly confused, “are you ok sir?”
“Yes, of course, I was just a tad busy that’s all...”
“But sir, I mean, your neck...”
She pointed to his neck, looking slightly repugnated. As he felt his neck he felt many little bobbles, like spots.
“Retrieve a Petri dish,” he ordered.
When she returned he squeezed one of the spots and released the forth-coming liquid into the dish. He started coughing. Soon the carpet was stained dark red, almost black, and the girl had long since run away.
Pete came to in a hospital room. At the end of his bed was a pile of work.
Marking, he thought groggily, damn, they never leave me alone do they...
“Hey, Mr McCarty!” he heard, accompanied by more girlish voices. He often felt that his only students were girls. In fact, that was almost true.
“Have you heard the news sir?” one of the girls asked.
This isn’t the news?
“Of course not!” said another one, wagging her slender finger and nodding knowingly, “He’s only just woke up!”
“What’s happened Alisha?” Pete added, smiling. Some baloney I expect...
The girls looked awkward, still unsure how to actually tell him. Alisha stepped forward, metaphorically.
“Well sir,” she began, looking like she was holding back a smile*, “... Jacqueline’s dead.”
Pete grimaced, well there goes next years’ holiday, he thought.
2 weeks later, every girl in Pete’s class who’d visited him was dead. He was a little fidgety now, sometimes taking his tie on and off again repeatedly. Women were now banned from his immediate vicinity. Taking the Petri dish from his pocket, Pete placed it under a microscope. The sample had begun to grow and was fairly large now, even moving visibly in the agar. It almost seemed to move in a rhythm and order.
The door burst open.
Pete’s girlfriend, Jenny, ran in.
“No! Stay back!” coughed Pete, choking on a polo he’d been sucking, “Do you wanna die?”
“They’re dying everywhere Pete. Everywhere you look, they’re dying.” She said grimly, switching on the TV.
Sure enough, there they were on the news, looking pretty much dead. A film crew had run in and the image was cut as the channel quickly tried to find something to hide the deaths.
“Wow!” said Jenny. She fell to her knees and her eyes burst. Soon Pete had left, feeling pretty darn annoyed.
When he got to his friend Tom’s lab he showed him the organism in the Petri dish. Tom deciphered the movements, recognising the Morse-code style of the movements straight away.
“You know, I thought something this small would be far too stupid to communicate, let alone use a form of code we created and have long since forgotten,” said Pete, shaking his head.
“Well, it’s a bit awful, I must admit,” Said Tom, “but look at us! I’m gonna see if it’ll respond to us if we also use Morse-code, though I don’t imagine its knowledge of English is that good, it just seems to keep saying ‘Cliff’.”
Finally the machine was all set, looking like a microscope with a probe on one side and a rather small monitor on the other. The probe sent Morse-code in the form of small shocks; while any code it received back was converted to letters and retyped on the monitor. The microscope element of the machine seemed fairly redundant. You couldn’t check the facial expressions of the creature more closely related to algae than to vertebrates.
HIYA, Tom sent.
HELLO, they sent back.
ARE YOU THE WOMAN KILLER SPORE ORGANISM? typed Tom.
YES, replied the organism. ALTHOUGH WE WERE ALSO MEANT TO KILL YOU. THERE WAS SOME SORT OF ERRER (SP.?)
ITS ACTUALLY ERROR, corrected Tom, CAN WE ASK YOU TO STOP KILLING?
ONLY BY CATCHING US ALL INDIVIDUALLY AND ASKING US. IN GENERAL WE WONT STOP THOUGH I SUSPECT. A UNANIMOUS VOTE IS REQUIRED.
SHIT, said Tom, WHY? he asked.
BECAUSE WHEN WE ACHIEVED SENTIENCE WE REALISED THERE WAS NO POINT IN LIVING. NOW WE’VE ADAPTED OURSELVES TO ONLY INFECT AND LIVE UPON HUMANS, WHOM WE CAN NOW KILL AND THEREFORE DIE ALTHOUGH NOT BEFORE SPREADING OUR SPORES, ANNOYINGLY. IT’LL ONLY BE A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE WE KILL MALES OF YOUR SPECIES TOO. THEN FINALLY WE WILL BE FREE AND WE CAN FREE YOU TOO. FOR ME IT’LL ONLY BE A LITTLE WHILE LONGER HERE ON YOUR PUS.
Pete looked annoyed, and a little bit upset. He took the keyboard from Tom.
HAVE YOU NO GOD? OR GODS? OR SOMETHING YOU ENJOY IN LIFE? he asked the organism.
NO.
Pulling the Petri-dish open, he crushed the organism. In the micro-organisms last dying seconds it sighed with relief before adapting and infecting Pete with the new, male-killing spores.
The Earth’s environment was saved, for all the wrong reasons.
A butterfly fluttered its beautiful wings as it crossed an airfield. An aeroplane landed and crushed it. What an artificial way to die, thought the butterfly.
*Alisha smiled on account of having won a bet and making a lot of money. The bet was that Jacqueline wouldn’t die from not eating enough. Alisha herself was of pleasurable weight, not plump but not only eating carrot sticks for her main meal. She exercised regularly.
Tuesday, 23 June 2009
we saw the sun
No-one can live without themselves,
Burning inside, a deep hunger to be a witness,
A power, to put ours on the shelves.
You cant hold up your fellow man,
If you don`t stand upon your own land,
The earth below you is deceit and misery,
A grim season.
Building a home but no-one to live,
A silent shelter unused cept by bugs,
You thought we would just multiply,
But you forget we will all die.
When the sun destroyed all creation,
Mankind`s hard work, burned, devastation...
And then we saw the light,
A flash in the sky up above...
Friday, 19 June 2009
myspace musings
Friday, 8 May 2009
love poem
Ice in your chest,
Crystal mess on the dress,
Expossessed.
Your love was flowin,
But now the eyes are grey, sweet, on display.
Tuesday, 28 April 2009
I Stole Your Vase
I was praying, You were quitting
We were running for the prize.
He appeared before me,
Told me you adore me,
But I just carried on the race.
When I came running past your
Drive I tried to stop and look in
But your curtains were still drawn.
So I took my chance and,
Snook in through the back way
You`ll never see your vase again...
Run!
I stole your vase.
<<>>
It only takes a midwife or two to get this party going.
I look outside and it is snowing.
And as i step outside I let go of your hand,
Into the white, but its just not fun to play in the cold anymore.
With all the doctors and the nurses too.
Theyre heading out, looking for you.
Theyre coming fast, the sirens sounding loud.
But we`ll have gone, disappeared in cloud.
We`re jetting over the alps, towards the sun,
We`re taken out, by a fighter,
And as I watch the last parachute go down,
I let my eyes burn in anger.
This party needs a makeover
So lets... call the... clown....
<>
Well they took me to the red square,
And they taught me bowt my friend mao there.
They said he was great
That I should work hard
And carry my pass.
Then, as I begin to get old,
Ive learned that maybe he wasnt that bald,
But how can I tell? When
The pictures just keep changing.
<>
Emotionless
like there`s no soul
We`re individuals
with nowhere to go
The earliest theory
to ever be said
Must have been a shock
Of development in linguistics.
I wont suppose
I wont assume
Teach what you like
Ive got the right to oppose
You explain theories
Teach what is popular
Scientists change their minds,
The textbook changes.
With each remodel
I become wiser
see the pattern ends
in disaster.
<>
Cos I know I need to take a bath and Chill
Unimpressed and overtired,
Taking all I know to be fact.
The greatest thing that happened to me,
Was finding out the end had come.
Messed all around, watching far too much,
As I hear my sand, released from my lips
The strangest things in life go down but
I really need a goddamn tavern.
Drinking the drunken miseries,
Its messing with my head.
Its taking me, so long for now,
Theres times I feel dead
of emotion I
cause no commotion I
constrict the tiniest detail
Cos I bring it down on other people
Its just a flood and it stretches the truth,
Cos I cant stand to josh anymore
TBH I think Ill just leave it to burn.
cavabath?
((% homework finished on time * % classwork finished on time)/ no. of students - 2(no. of students))/100
- % homework finished on time times % classwork finished on time
- divided by no. of students - 2(no. of students)
- which is divided by 100
Well shuttle my cock and call it what you will.
But none was addressed to me, so i am sad. You would be too. And why can they not spell my surname?! There is no Y!
I would like to have a bowl of `Y` soup tonite. Using the bones of letter people who spell incorrectly. Maybe I could make a bone seat to sit on too, while I ate the soup. Perfect.
I believe there is a sports turnament happening in China today. However, despite harrassment, the radio would not tell me which sport. So I am forced to imagine.
Sense-bending I reckon
multicolored pen
Mister Blister seems to have a large hiss at the beginning however it improves massively and is rather melodious.
If information were amusing,
We would all be abusing
It, to get a laugh
For free.
Since it rarely seems to be,
Is more often than not,
About death and pain.
It is time to take the strain,
Keep up, and change the world.
That was my lovely poem for today.
If your wind passages are assaulted,
Be assured the Queen was halted.
A pain in my ear. Not inside of it, not outside, more in the middle. This is part cause, of this.
My job. It is not without perks such as a wage. And. That is all.
I have made some friends. They have names. I remember one is called Jonny and also one is called Nicky. There is a drummer and bassist. Work band? I think so. So do they, apparently.
I suppose that this is the end of today, as Scotland and Ireland won. I do not think I will celebrate in any special way. I had two glasses of wine.
Today I did 10 til 4.30.
This equates to `some` money earned.
Thank you.
p.s. A crime investigator
who cant say `eff` only
`fuh` - against
Mr F. Knieval hehe